Quarantine Day 30

Inside and dreaming. I stared at her like I may not see her again. That’s how I always look at her. When I first met her she was a stranger. She had been with me my entire life. Life is short and I’m out of control. I work to reign it in but it seems to get away from me more often than I am comfortable facing. Don’t tell my fears they are irrational. I am living with one of them.

Lifeless bodies line the streets of some countries. They are unclaimed and potent. They are my fears and nightmares. There’s no escaping reality inside. There’s no escaping the pounding news and unfortunate, unexplainable hardships and struggles. It’s worse than ever and worse than some could have ever imagined.

Imagination could be an escape but you have to focus. You have to sit still and leave. It may not be quiet. The sirens. Are they more frequent or am I more sensitive? How could I be more sensitive? She’s not aware. She plays with a smile that is fearless and satisfied. I leave her longer and she hugs me. I try to soak it in. This time that was gifted to me to pause and revel. I believe in signs and I’ll take it. Silver linings and slowing down on day 30.