Social Media: Junk Food For Your Brain
The other night I was falling asleep feeling glutinous. So much so that I worked to reflect on all the sugar I ate and found zero remanence. Why was I feeling so fatigued and guilty?
Like clockwork I had dinner at 8:30pm while consuming an hour of TV. It was my husband’s turn to do the dishes. I didn’t peel myself off the couch to start my 30 minute beauty routine before bed, do some yoga, meditate, and journal. Maybe throw some tarot practice in there. I didn’t attempt any mindful self care.
Instead I grabbed my phone and cozied up with TikTok for a half hour. Why? Sometimes I learn things like how to fold a bag of chips so it stays closed or some funny joke I can tell during awkward silent moments. Other than that its an amalgamation of people falling, singing, dancing, babies crying or laughing, tragic stories, and Charli and company. It is more numbing than binge-watching Netflix, indulging in sugar, or drinking. By the time I brushed my teeth, still watching TikTok, I felt like I had wasted so much time doing something so incredibly meaningless and felt extremely guilty.
My husband was leaving for a trip the next day, I wouldn't see him for four days and I barely looked at him because I was so engrossed in TikTok. I hated myself for it and was judging myself for caring so much about something that didn’t give me anything tangible or useful in return. Only self-pity.
My promise to myself at the start of the year was to be on social media less. It’s hard being that social media is my career and knowing every new feature, platform, and algorithm change is at the core of my success. I have to disconnect but I am so obsessed with it. The way social media brings people together equally tearing them apart. How these platforms act as validation for so many young adults and probably many adults makes me feel sad and a little confused about fake confidence and social media induced insecurities. Social media bullying has led to deaths and one post can lead to virality equaling fame. Marginalized communities can go to social to vent, form meaningful groups in solidarity and move to change systemic issues that plague our nation like racism, xenophobia, homophobia, and so many other hateful subsets of society.
I fall into it occasionally like Alice falling, falling into another world with trippy cats and late rabbits.
My solution for now is to set a timer for 10 minutes. The alarm alerts me to close my phone and I peel myself off the couch to indulge in meaningful nighttime activities and go to bed without Renegade lulling me to sleep.